I'm Skinny the Foo, who the fuck are you?!? Never mind; I really don't care. I'm getting increasingly disgusted by the bandwidth being wasted here on feebs like Chicken Fingers and that upstart Ozzy the Cat, so, being a Foo, I decided to commandeer some bandwidth of my own! Hey, Tripod can't stop me, nor can my alter ego, Andersen Silva. ;P~~~
No idea who/what I am? Well, screw you! There's a not-terribly accurate "Facts" page here. In any case, the less you carbon-based life forms know about me, the better, I say. What you should know is that I live in electric current, preferably running through devices with some sort of computing power. I can exist in a refrigerator, but I suppose it would be the equivalent of one of you kept drugged in a padded cell. Of course, it's just about impossible to keep me anyplace... My favorite haunts lately are Andy's computers, and his mobile phone, which is a little uncomfortable, but hey, I love to travel. Which brings me to...
Heh-heh-heh...! I'm sure he won't like this! Must suck not to be able to edit content on your own Web site, huh?!? ;P Oh, well...!
Let's see... Friday evening/night (June 30th) was boooring. He got out of work early, rode the usual bus into Port Authority... then got a call from Julia while heading for his second bus (back home to Nutley). They decided on where and when they'd meet Saturday for their date. Big deal. Then he went home, got another call from Jon, discussed... oh, not even worth it. Had a Killian's Red, worked on his Web site for a while, then chatted with Jules, and went to bed. Overall, I'd give Friday an 11 out of 101. That's binary, people.
Saturday turned out to be more exciting. Andy went out to get the bus to the City in the morning... and waited for 45 minutes before admitting to himself that it just wasn't coming! Ha-ha-ha! Muttering obscenities under his breath, he trudged quickly back home and ended up paying for an expensive cab ride to Manhattan. This, to me, was the highlight of the entire day. I still need to check in with DeCamp to find out why the bus never showed; it was scheduled... In any case, he got to the Museum and met Julia, a bit late (luckily for him, she'd called while he was in the cab, and he was able to warn her that he was running late).
'n she turned out to be quite a looker. Hmmm, if I can get myself placed into a cybernetic body... anyway. They toured the Museum (another classic moment: Andy slipping on the stairway and losing his footing for two or three steps!), exchanged anecdotes, got mildly lost (whereupon the female had to ask for directions; why is that?), finally found the minerals and meteorites and things, whereupon they started using the word "carbonaceous" as a new synonym for "cool." Sure. Fine. Whatever.
Then on to Pizzeria Uno for "linner," which consisted of quesadillas, a Greek salad, and a grilled chicken breast sandwich. No, I don't know who had what. Why the hell should I care? The sap gave her a couple of little gifty things, too. Wow... After passing one of the visiting Cow Parade cows, they rode the subway to the ferry, where he waited with her 'til her ship was in. Heh... At which point they- nah, I don't want to get into it.
Then he went home, and promptly went out again, with his friend Kim and her cousin Jessica. The first joint was dead. It was Fourth of July weekend! The second joint was great, if you like guys named Tony who wear eight gold chains and drive IROCs. They wisely didn't actually enter that one... And then they ended up at Rick's, where there was some good (and some not-so-good) '80s dance music playing. When the DJ played Andy's requested "Push It," he got up and- well, boogied is really not an appropriate word. In any case, he did do the booty bomp with Jess. Who frantically called him back up to the dance floor later when some jerk wouldn't leave her alone. Kim, her cuz, and Mr. Silva departed (in various states of inebriation) to the proverbial diner afterwards, and Andy got in around 3:30 AM. With the faux pas, alleged 'dancing,' and high female content, I think this day rated a 100. Lots o' entertainment.
And the weekend wasn't half over yet! Of course, Sunday was almost half over by the time he got out of bed. Heh-heh! Andy joined his family for a picnic in the park, receiving a call from his old friend Dawn about attending a free concert on the Fourth. After gorging himself with grilled meats (and a reasonable facsimile of a Creamsicle), it was on to home, where (yawn) he started watching "2001: A Space Odyssey." Then Kim and Jessica (who was still around) invited him over to watch (yawn) "That Thing You Do." They stopped for ice cream first (what a pig this guy is!), then dropped themselves onto various pieces of furniture in front of the television set (what, no HDTV yet?!?) with Kim's mom and brother. Michael rightly lamented the low-tech video cassette they were using instead of DVD. After the movie, blondie returned home to do some surfing and then hit the sack. Final score for the day? A 10. Lucky to get that.
I decided to rough it for a bit Monday morning; while Andy had his phone recharging, I slipped through the electron stream and into his amplifier as he played. It feels good to bask in the raw power of distorted guitar once in a while. Headed back for the phone, though, so I could tag along for the ride with Jon to Guitar Center. Now there was some equipment I could get cozy in. Give me a nice synth/sequencer, and I might even leave you humans alone for a few weeks while I composed... But, damn and blast! there was no way for me to interface with any of it from the phone.
Why would anyone voluntarily subject himself to six or more White Castle hamburgers? Ugh! Well, they did. Then... get this! They went to a bookstore! How quaint! Ink, on paper! People are still using those things?!? Ha-ha! So much content available digitally, and yet... oh, it's too funny. At least they had just enough sense to browse through computer-related books. And once they'd gone back home, I got a nice surprise...
A Nintendo Entertainment System! Man, did that bring back some memories. One of my first apartments was an NES. I took advantage of the static electricity produced by the television, and the ringing phone when Kim called, to cross into the machine and check the place out. Also screwed around with their game of "Mario Bros." Heh-heh...
Got home (via a leisurely millisecond stroll through the power cables of Clifton and Nutley) in plenty of time to eavesdrop on Andy and Julia's conversation. They both had a great time on Saturday, they had to get together again soon, so cute, so sweet, blah-blah-blah. The day drew to a close, earning somewhere between an 11 and a 100 (dammit, why didn't they take decimals into account when they devised binary?!?).
Tuesday, the Fourth of July, Dawn and her husband Dave arrived in the morning, were subjected to some of Andy's music, and then departed with him for the Park-and-Ride. They parked the car, and rode the bus to Manhattan, then walked to Central Park. Hence the name: park, and ride. Am I going too fast for you people? After lunch at Kaplan's, they headed back into the Park and rollerbladed for a bit, then caught the SummerStage concert with Mary Lou Lord ("Aim Low" and "1952 Vincent Black Lightning" were good tunes), Simi (I can't believe I can't find anything on this band on the Internet! and if I can't find anything...), and, of course, Joan Jett and the fuckin' Blackhearts! They rocked. Andy's phone was resonating like mad from the first chord of "Bad Reputation," and while I was sending power surges through the circuitry to "Light of Day" and "Fetish," he was bangin' his head to "Cherry Bomb" and "Roadrunner." And those last coupla songs! "Love Is All Around" (that 'Mary Tyler Moore' theme), the Stooges' "I Wanna Be Your Dog," "Crimson and Clover," "I Love Rock 'n Roll," and the feel-good anthem "I Hate Myself For Loving You." Awesome! I recharged the phone myself! Heh-heh-heh... Andy and his companions left before the encore began, but they still heard "Real Wild Child" and "Everyday People" as they exited the Park.
That was pretty much it for Tuesday the Fourth. They rode the bus back to the Park-and-Ride, retrieved the vehicle, headed back to the Nuthouse... were subjected to more of Andy's music, live this time... Dawn and Dave left, Andy did some more surfing... I think he saw some of Nutley's fireworks display through the window. Lazy son-of-a-bitch... But, thanks to the powerhouse Blackhearts, this day came close to a perfect 101 in my eBook. The whole weekend? I give it a proton up. I'm gonna go get some juice now. Be back soon...!