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Transporting this Web site or any of its associated files across U.S. state lines is a violation of subsection 42q, section 33, article 109d of the National Security Act
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The Webmaster neither confirms nor denies reports of an increase in sexual pleasure for visitors to Extreme Close-Up. If true, it is a thus far unproven positive side
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To the best of the Webmaster's knowledge, no three-toed tree sloths have been injured in the creation of Extreme Close-Up. However, several coelacanth dinners were
prepared before the facts became clear. Sorry. Dem's good eatin', though.
All information, events, names, and prices are subject to change or withdrawal.
Past and present employees of Toys "R" Us may be in violation of Company policy by viewing material on Extreme Close-Up. Tempting, isn't it?
All opinions expressed herein are those of the Webmaster and/or Skinny the Foo and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of former U.S. President Jimmy Carter or
former U.S. Vice-President Dick Cheney.